Well, good and weird news.
Good news is that tomorrow I should have my computer back, yay!
Weird news is that it was a RAM module all along the cause of the problem and static, I don't understand anything anymore. :|
I didn't get all of your story. Was this audio static? Closest I ever came to that was in a BIOS revision where at certain RAM frequencies my RAM controller was drawing power to the point where my south bridge was losing sufficient power, which directly led to audio static (and instability).